God answers prayer//typing//Mercedes//found screenplay!

9.26.05

Well, God answered an unspoken prayer today--it looks as if I’ll be staying working where I am rather than be transferred to a place I didn’t want to go. I didn’t expressly say I didn’t want to go there but that I would go where they wanted me, which is still how I feel. Yet God has coordinated circumstances such that things have worked out for me to stay where I am. I’m believing this is the way things will stay.
Other than that, I’m just one grateful dude. God’s brought me food, drink mmoney, has patched relationships that needed it--a lot of good stuff going on. And I’m not nearly so into flirting with gals on chats as I used to be. It just got to be too much spiritually--too much to bear, doing too much wrong stuff. So I talked with one of them last night and let her know, during the conversation, that I’ve no problem not being physical with her. Frankly, and I didn’t say this, I don’t particularly care to see her again not because of any resentment on my part toward her but because she’s just not my type--yet I was willing to settle for her, which even if it worked out would have been the wrong thing to do.
I remember not too long ago that a grandma came up to me in church and prayed for me, under the unction of the Holy Spirit, not to settle when it came to women but to get the right one. Right after that, a bunch of the wrong women came into my life, but they’re pretty well out now, thank God. It’s not their fault--it’s mine--I was willing to settle for women I wouldn’t have looked twice at before just because I wanted some physical companionship. But that’s not what God wants, and really it’s not what I want, either. I just want to get and remain ever closer to God, to walk (live my life according to) His ways in an ever-increasing way. To walk in the commandment of love (Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and all your strength and love your neighbor as yourself). Everything else will fall into place once I am consistent in doin gthat.
I’ve started to do that, walk in the commandment of love, and I’m eager to keep doing so.
Lately, I’ve even seen some of the results of having done that--I’ve gotten chances, and taken them, to give a subtle witness at work, to answer a question of why I’m so happy, to impart some wisdom or a word God’s given me for somebody--and yet not to preach doing it. God will just order circumstances such that the willing can share Him in the perfect way and at the perfect time. That’s part of God’s genius.
I tell ya, ever since I started listening to Copeland’s tapes in the car, I’ve been moving into a deeper spiritual realm while remaining...accessible in the world. It’s a matter of knowing what’s really going on spiritually and being able to communicate that to those who need it; it’s not a matter of being, as they say, so heavenly-minded that I’m no earthly good. There are those who are so. I try not to be one of them. I’m pretty sure there are areas in that in which I can improve. :)
I like what Joyce Meyer was referring to last night on her show: preach at all times, and if necessary, use words. In other words, let your life be your witness--people will be able to tell much more about you by the way you are, by your actions, than by what you say. Now, there’s an area in which I need help, so anybody who’s reading this who feels led to pray for me in this area, or any area, I invite and welcome your prayers.
Wow. When I was about to write that preaching line, the thought just...left. So I wondered whether I was supposed to write it. Then I prayed about it, saying to God that if he wanted me to put that down, then reveal the thought to me. Within two minutes, He brought it to my remembrance. Good stuff!
-Different subject...sort of--
You know, there’s such a simple joy in typing. The physical act of pushing these buttons. I’m so glad I found this pleasure early on, at about age 10. I remember that I was at our friends Janet and Keith’s house and mom had, or they had, this old typewriter. I started pecking away at it, and I was just hooked. I liked the pressing of the buttons, I liked the sharp snap of hammer on paper and roller. I liked the solidity of a good old manual typewriter. I feel like getting another one now, but I don’t know. There are so many advantages to the computer that I wonder if I’ll not regret getting a typewriter to supplement something I already have.
One thing I am considering is a desktop computer in order to have the keyboard (getting the keyboard alone seems silly--to use with a device that already has a keyboard). I tend to make more mistakes using the keyboard on a laptop, or on the last two laptops I’ve had, than on/with a traditional keyboard. I think it has something to do with key travel. I don’t even think it would be just an excuse to get another gadget, as I like this laptop (though I’m believing for an even better one once it’s time).
Speaking of believing, I went to Joe Marina Honda, nudged there by God, and looked around at the Honda Accords there, the Civics, and when I was done and in my car again, I decided, “You know what? These aren’t what I’m believing for. It’s not what I’m believing for.” So I went to Jackie Cooper and looked at the Mercedes again--much better--It’s like, I’m believing for a specific thing, and I think I have God’s backing on it, and now as nice as these other cars are, they’re not what I’m believing for, and so I don’t want them. Sounds high-falooting, arrogant, whatever--or one could see it as just...focused. Interesting.

Here's another answer to prayer--just found a print-out of a short screenplay I'd thought lost. I thought I'd have to re-write it but wanted to look through my stuff again once to see if I indeed have a hard copy. Turns out I do, thank God. I asked him to show it to me if he wanted me to have this screenplay, and He did. Thank God! Praise God!

wanna share

Just wanted to share some photos of some of my favorite people--not all, but some:




Laura--isn't she beautiful? :) The feller is Steve Clarke.


Todd and myself



Laura and friends

Glory to God for a great day!

9/15/05

I gotta tell ya, this is one day that started out bad and wound up great.
I had an appointment to for an audition in Oklahoma City, and I didn’t fully trust my car. And I didn’t have cell phone service, although that wasn’t so important once I found out I could still call 911 from an inactive (not with a carrier) phone.

And I was late. My appointment was at 2:10, and I got there at about 2:30.

Well, turns out it didn’t really matter because two minutes after I got to the casting agent, he came out and called for who was ready. I hadn’t even sat down yet. Sooo, I didn’t have time to get nervous, which worked wonderfully in my favor; the audition went well.

After the interview and audition, I felt this huge release of tension, got in the car and played a Kenneth Copeland tape, following along audibly (I’ve listened to it almost enough to have more than half of it memorized), and came back stronger spiritually than I was when I left. It’s amazing how much more exciting it is to listen to one of Copeland’s messages, which are exciting, when I can follow along almost word for word. As we live by the words that come out of our mouth, I just felt great speaking the words of God through Kenneth through my own mouth. I can see why preachers love to preach so much.

And the car is fine. I’m believing nothing went mechanically wrong with it--I laid hands on it and prayed for its mechanical soundness and for a perfect trip to OKC and back. And that’s what I got, glory be to God!

And then I got to go to church--yes, on a Thursday--and they’ve redone the stage, and it looks great, Eastman preached a good message--I mean to tell you, what Satan intended for bad (he was trying to make me afraid of this trip, which told me God really wanted me to do it), God turned around for good. And I’m counting my audition as a seed which will grow into some wonderful parts in movies, which will grow into others, better ones, of the same. And now I'm about to have some good food, play on the computer a bit and enjoy a couple of good movies.

Oh, and the phone I've been waiting for has arrived and is in the apartment complex's office, thank God!

Oh, glory to God! Thank you God! Hallelujah to His Name! Amen!

stargazing

I was just thinking of an e-mail I’d sent to Kenneth Copeland Ministries where I mentioned how much I’d like to meet Kenneth, but how it didn’t matter whether I met him in this life or in Heaven--one way or another, I’ll get to meet him.

I was thinking, then, just now, of how cool it’s going to be when I get to Heaven. I’ll get to meet up with loved ones who’ve gone on ahead, and I’ll get to meet so many other wonderful people. Every star I’ve liked who was a Christian, I’ll meet there. The giants of the Bible--Moses, David, Solomon, Abraham, Isaac, Samson, all of these people I’ll get to meet and be friends with. We’ll have all of eternity to get to know one another, and we’ll be meeting under the best conditions possible.

I just think that’s so great--not only do we get to sit around and chat face-to face with Jesus, be person-to-person friends with Him, but all of the fringe benefits.

I wonder so much. What’s my house in Heaven going to look like? What shape will I be in when I arrive there? Keith Moore put it like this: that when we go on to Heaven, we’ll just slip out of our earthly body, which fits like a perfectly tailored glove, look around and say, “Well, that’s over.” and just go on in glory from there. Isn’t that terrific? It’ll be like waking out of a dream, and that our lives here will be like a fast-fading memory. Kenneth Copeland said we’re not here, in this Earth but a few days, that all of our eternity depends on the choice we make right now. I’m so glad I’ve made the right one.

Now I want to be used of God to win souls, to bring more people into the Kingdom. I don’t want anybody to go to that other place, to Hell. From what I understand, that place is more terrible, more just flat evil than anybody on earth can imagine. I mean, take your worst image, your most horrific imagining, multiply it by infinity and you still don’t approach what hell is going to be like for the damned. That’s partially because we, humans, were not intended for that place. That’s for the Devil and the other angels who fell with him. It was not designed for us. I don’t believe we are welcome there except as objects to torment. There will be no respite, no ease, no pleasantness--just plain torture, unimaginable torture for all eternity, a constant death. What on this earth could possibly be worth having when it would lead to that place. And why, oh why, given the power of words, would anybody seriously say to another, “Go to hell” or “Damn you” or something like that. This world was created using the force of love and faith and with the commanding force of those put into words. God _spoke_, he used words, and created this whole universe and everything in it. Life and death are in the power of the tongue, which is why we’re to guard the words coming out of our mouth so.

Oh, but Heaven--wow. The complete opposite. I don’t think we’ll be sitting around getting fat, but boy will we be happy--indescribably so. And satisfied. And absolutely awash in love--nothing can ever hurt us again. Nothing. It’s the ultimate safe place.

And the bodies we get when we’re come into the Kingdom--we’ll look like us, only glorified. I don’t know what that means in this case, except to say which is subject to or working with the physics of the spirit world rather than confined to the physics of the natural world.

There’s a lot more I could perhaps say, but I dunno--might sound kinda flaky. One other thing I am glad of is that these impressions I hav ehad of Heaven, of the nature of things, have proven out to be true, and that God has given me insight, as he will those who ask, into the way of things and helped me, prepared me to believe more easily than I might otherwise.

new blog

I’m sitting here during a rather boring day at work--as it’s a holiday, there isn’t a lot to do. I think most people are spending time with family and friends. I’d be glad to, but I need the seed--and I’m scheduled to work today anyway.

I actually love working holidays because of the more money, and because most holidays have little to no meaning for me anyway.

This blog has gotten so irregular--I think it’s just lack of interest on my part. But, at the same time, I still like having it. i think it’s a matter of not wanting to rehash the same stuff over and over. I’ve read one person’s journal online that was well-written and all, but it was pretty much the same thing day after day. It was like a daily report. More interesting than NASA’s daily reports when I subscribed to them, but same principle.

Hey, let me know what you think of this potential movie production company logo above.