money

I gotta thank God for this: I was pretty close to the bottom of the checking account yesterday and was happy to be able to get a quart of milk and still be relatively comfortable. As I was driving home, I rejoiced over that quart of milk--it meant cream(sorta) for my coffee and milk for cereal. I thought, "God always provides" and smiled inwardly.

Whatever our financial need, if we'll take it to Him and do what He says, He'll take care of it.

Thank You, Father, for always taking care of it. :-)

Glory to God! 10%!

Glory to God, my mechanic gave me 10% off work done today as well as 10% off some work we know about that will need to be done. Talk about favor!

Thank You, Father!

Listening to the Believer's Voice of Victory, I also received a reminder to take care of my body, that I needn't be addicted to anything--sugar, coffee, whatever. Thank You for that, too, Father. :-)

--love, Sean

obedience

Here's something else God told me: "If I don't get the obedience, you don't keep the anointing." God doesn't want a bunch of disobedient children. He loves us and wants the best for us; he is God and we need, or at least I need, to obey Him. Only then can He do what He wants through us and, by the way, only then can we walk in His blessing and get all He wants for us.

He also said this: "The difference between David and Saul is as Mike said: David was a good repenter." and "If you confess your sins, I am faithful and just to forgive them" and I feel like God said, "but don't use that as an excuse to sin. I want the best life for you, and for that, you need to keep moving forward. Now, get up and let's go."

Once again, thanks Father.

black skin

I remember, when I was quite a lot younger, trying to rub the black off my skin, hoping it would be white underneath. It didn't. What was very disappointing.

Not so much anymore. It is what it is. And that's the way God made me. Who am I to second-guess God?

Thank You, Father, for making me the way You made me.

respect

God said this to me: "Prayers work whatever the circumstances as long as they're honest. It's great to show Me respect, but better respect is to obey Me."

Thank You, Father, for that.

ideas?

Anybody had ideas on how to make this blog more popular?

-Sean

reminder

Sean Johnston Today, listening to a message presented by Joel Osteen, I decided to bloom where I'm planted. Reminds me about soemething a certain eldest sister of mine said... ;)

Thanks for the reminder, Father. :-)

results

Today, I'm grateful for return on spiritual investments--doing something nice and not calling attention to it (though I hoped for some recognition of it or anticipated that the person would be pleased, which they were).

I'm grateful for tater tots, dr. pepper, a working car, a clean shirt, Kenneth E. Hagin and his following the Lord's leading, the importance of obedience being pointed out to me, a functioning phone, good dental work, motorcycles and burgeoning wisdom and knowledge.

Thanks, Father.

obedience

Listening to a Jerry Savelle message today, I learned the one thing I've been missing that is necessary for God to move in my life: obedience. Oops. The Holy Spirit has been trying to tell me that, but have I listened? Nooooo. Now I got it.

Thanks for the information, Father. :-)

helps to ask

I asked God to help me find something. Less than two seconds later, I found it. Helps to ask God.

Thanks, Father. :-D

lesson learned

I was just watching "Spartacus: Blood and Sand", and it occurs to me that if this is a relatively accurate depiction of the Roman Empire at that time, it's not so far removed from some aspects of our culture.

The Roman Empire fell.

oops

I have to apologise right now to Eugene H. Peterson, author of "The Message", a paraphrasing of the Bible. I'd thought idioms and conversational phrases were his attempt to be cool, to be conversational, him being in love with his writing and his voice. Turns out he, at least in the New Testament, was simply writing from the Greek and maybe updating the phraseology.

I need to stop sitting in judgement. The seat simply doesn't fit me.

If Mr. Peterson reads this, I apologise. Please forgive me. God bless you and yours.

Thank You, Father, for the correction.

gratitude

God takes such good care of me. Specials on things I want, pay raises, favor, good health, multiple talents and good parents, family and friends and church and connections. Thank You, Father, for:

my parents
family
dr. pepper
cake donuts
a good car
ears that hear
good, cheap speakers
the printer working
a willing heart
a beautiful evening
pastor Mike

prayer

Here's something good to pray if you feel led to: "Jesus, I confess you as my Lord and my Savior. Take my life and do something with it." Congratulations! You're saved. :) Now go get a good Bible and start going to a good church where the Word of God is preached.

Have a good night!

old blog reposted

This is a blog I found when I was traipsing through the archives. It still reflects my feelings, and I thought I'd re-post it. Again:

Los Angeles in the fall

Like thousands, perhaps millions, of others, I went to Los Angeles in pursuit of a dream; I was going to be a star.
Then I arrived in Hollywood. Almost immediately, I felt betrayed, lied to, scared and intimidated. That was before I got out of the car. Hollywood wasn't as advertised. Surprise.
I found my way, after a few trips around the block, to the hostel where I was to stay, got a parking place and settled in.
Over the next few days, I drove around to what places I could, took care of getting set up in L.A.. I even took in _The Tonight Show with Jay Leno_ on a lark.
I got registered with Central Casting, got to know some of the people at the hostel and tried to get work. And tried. And tried, until, finally, a woman named Cathy who was also staying where I was suggested I spec the movie on which she worked as an extra. To spec means you go to where they’re shooting, meet the extras casting director and see if they can use you for the day. I didn’t get the job the first or second day, I think, but before long, Marty took me in and I wound up working for, in total, perhaps ten or eleven days on the Adam Sandler remake of _The Longest Yard_ (cool--met Stone Cold Steve Austin, made some friends--great stuff with great people).

I was going to chronicle all the stuff that happened out there, on the shoot and in L.A., but I won't. I feel like I'd be repeating myself. So, the nub of it:

L.A. is like many other places: harsh and kind, hard yet welcoming, expensive yet...well, expensive. Thanks to God, I found nothing but people wanting to help me out, but I was unprepared and didn’t want it enough. Point: If you're going there to be a star, take this in: Want it so much you HAVE to do it; then prepare yourself. Bring four, five grand if you’ve already got a car; be prepared to buy one if you haven’t got one. Even with people helping you, if you haven’t the training, the desire, the work ethic (you're there to WORK), and the resources, you’re setting yourself up to fail. So get them, then go. And be nice. Really, you've no idea how important that is (but here's a hint: you CANNOT make it alone). People will respond in kind.

So I'd like to thank the following people for their kindness, the likes of which I'll never forget:

Keri--for being so welcoming and introducing me to Ruby and Savannah, for wanting to include me
Ian--for showing me much respect and earning mine in the bargain
Mark--for trying so hard for me
Carson--for the listening and the commitment
Cathy--for the open door; I might not have lasted as long as I did out there without you
Carl--for being so compassionate
Paul--for also trying for me. I seriously want to work with you, dude, someday
Dale--for caring so much, for checking up on me, for listening, for being like an uncle to me
Freddy--for also caring, helping out when you could, for supporting me especially at the low point; you're all heart, man
Kendall--for also trying
Sticks--for the introduction to Deadwood
Jesse from the food fight scene and Deadwood--for being so accepting
Marty--for taking a chance on me
Sean P.--for putting up with another neurotic actor
Steve Austin--just for saying hello--I watched you work, and I've so much respect for you
Terry Crews--for being a regular guy, welcoming and friendly to me when you didn't even know me. Thanks for that.

Anybody else I forgot, sorry and thanks. I haven't given up on movies; I'm just going around the back door.

Finally, thank you, God. I learned things on that trip I could never have learned without going to L.A. And now I feel free. Thank You. I love You.

---------------------------------------
3/21/2010

Everything I said in there is still so. And as I prepare for my second attempt at making it in L.A., it's a good experience to keep in mind--a good learning experience.

Thanks, Father, for having me write this down and post it.

change

Reading along with my pastor's reading plan today, I came across 1 Chronicles 29:28 and noted to my assistant pastor that I claimed the first half of that. He said, "Why not the whole thing?" I thought about it, and God revealed it more to me--now I claim the whole thing.

Thank You, Father, for that. :)

apology

So I used to look so down on books I'd look at that came from Oral Roberts Ministries, not because they were bad books but because this thing would be all in caps, that thing would be underlined, maybe more than once--the whole formatting thing seemed so wrong. Then I found out that thats the way Oral Roberts wrote--the printers at ORM, or ORU, were just printing it the way Oral wrote it. And Oral wrote, I believe, the way God told him to. So who am I to question it. So I apologize for that.

Thank You, Father, for Oral Roberts, his books and for getting me to this place.

nobody

In certain fields, people who are not famous and/or influential are referred to as "nobodies". I've actually encountered it even at my level. Always perturbs me.

Get this: NOBODY is nobody.

Thank You, Father, for having me write this and for this truth: everybody is somebody to You.

people

Just watching a TV show, "Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles". John Connor just said to somebody that people cannot be replaced. There's truth in that. People are not expendable. Think about it. This is why we call them employees, soldiers, units...pawns. To get away with treating them as though they are.

Nobody gets away with anything. Ever.

Thank You, Father, for treating people like people.

Check this out.

salvation

Thankful God's part of my life and I'm saved. Also amazed at how easy it is to get that. I recommend it highly. I think the shortest salvation prayer was, in the Bible, "Lord!" (somebody in the New Testament). Also amazed at how complicated we tend to make things. :P

Thanks, Father, for simplicity and salvation. :D

Kenneth Copeland Ministries

Today, I thank God for Kenneth Copeland Ministries. I've learned so much from them, or, actually, from Him (God) through them. Thanks, Father, for Kenneth Copeland Ministries. :-)

I dunno

There's a lot that I don't know. Like that I'm supposed to blog about something, but I don't remember what it was--I'll just write it down when it occurs to me again.

Had a chance to reconnect with an old acquaintance/now friend from high school. She's pretty cool, and she has a service that gives rides home to people who have had a bit too much to drink. That's very cool, and I admire her for doing that--making a living doing a good thing.

Thanks, Father, for people like her.

forgiveness

Today I thank God for His forgiveness and for the increased ability I have through Him to forgive.

I also thank Him for the increased effect memorization of Scripture has--it's like the difference between knowing about a race car and driving one.

I'm also thankful for the favor I seem to be getting shown lately--that's His doing. :)

Thank You, Father. :)

"Eureka"

I finally gave the show "Eureka" another chance after not making it through the first episode a long time ago. I've come across others who said they never got into it, but I'd encourage everybody who likes quirky, intelligent SF comedy to give it a go. Very, very good show.

Thanks, Father, for good entertainment. And for a great day. :-)

Glory to God!

Prayed for somebody--God's taken care of it. Thanks, Father. Again. ;)

knowledge and tithing

So grateful for absolute knowledge of my own salvation. I'd been pretty sure for a long time. Now, because of a recent event, I'm absolutely sure--I understand more what it means to know that I know that I know. Also grateful that an acquaintance is considering tithing. :D Glory to God for that. Thanks , Father.

dark time

Just reflecting as I'm listening to a message from Brian Houston--had a dark time that God got me through recently. Glory to God for getting me through. Thanks, Father, for that. :)

happy

Very cool that just after I decided to be happy, I got Joel Osteen's ( http://www.joelosteen.com ) latest message on podcast called "Living Life Happy".

Thanks for Your timing, Father. Impeccable as ever. :)

playability

Just ready to watch some of "Eureka"--disc wouldn't play but would in my proper DVD player. Was gonna call Netflix about it, but they had online help and suggested wiping the disc with a damp cloth (I'd already tried dry-wiping it, getting some stuff off it). I tried the damp clothe. It worked. Thank God. I didn't wanna wait to watch this.

Thanks, Father. :)

Oscars

I'm so happy for the results of last night's Oscars--I'm so happy for these people. :) It's like my superbowl and the people for whom I was pulling won against some great competition.

Father, if I can act in a movie with any of these, winners and nominees alike, well...wow. That would be amazing. I thank You in advance for it.

grace

Today, Father, I also thank You for Your grace.

good hard drive

Today I thank God for a good external hard drive (and thanks, D., for recommending it). I put it through its paces yesterday, and it did really well, which is important when you're editing video.

best way to get a sale

Best way to get a sale: be honest, personable and professional. Which means: know your stuff, be nice and remember this is business. If you're doing it right, you'll at least plant a seed, and they'll come back when they're ready because you've passed their test. If you're doing it great, you'll probably get a sale, assuming the browser isn't just browsing.

Thank You, Father, for those who know the value of honesty, balance and professionalism.

happiness, cont'd.

So much of our lives are in our control. We decide what to talk about, what to meditate on (which can mean "think about" or "worry about" depending on the motive) and whether to consider the consequences, positive or negative, of such talk and meditation. Time to take some responsibility

I don't really know what it is or what it means to be happy, other than that it's up to me whether I am or not. I'll just let God show me the rest of it. :)

happy

Today I decided to be happy. It's a decision, not a goal.

Thanks for clearing that up, Father.

idea

I'd gotten down on myself for forgetting to bring my external hard drive along with me today in order to edit a film I've been putting off doing for a long time. God just suggested I get the thing and then go to Barnes & Noble--that way I get a lot of time, I'm in an area of town where I'll need to be anyway and I'm still in a pretty comfortable environment.

Thanks for the suggestion, Father. :D

Goodwill

Just gave some clothes to Goodwill, and it feels so good to have done that. Got rid of some stuff and maybe somebody will get some good wear out of them. I thank God for Goodwill and the convenient donation bins they have throughout town.

Thank You, Father, for those and for providing the time, resources and inclination to do this.

Goodwill rocks!

surprising abundance

Found out that I have more money than I thought I had--nice to know/find that sort of stuff out. Also decided that, as of today, all money that is from overtime, less the tithe, will go toward L.A. Gotta get there sometime and stop delaying it. 40 may be the new 30, but 40 becomes 41, then 42, then, eventually, 70, then 80--God can redeem the time, but I'd rather he not have to.

There's something else I am supposed to blog about, but it slips my mind for now.

It's interesting that I believe it's easier to become a Hollywood star than to get married, at least to the right person. Thing is, neither is harder than the other if I'll just follow God, listen to the Holy Spirit and do as I'm told by Him. For now, I believe I'm just to pray and believe. For both. As to steps, I definitely want God to show me, clearly and in a way I can't dispute, what to do and what not to do.

Just remembered--see above posted blog.

Thank You, Father, for showing me.

dental work

Had a lot of dental work lately. Today's the first day I can chew normally...pretty much.

Thanks, Father, for good teeth and your healing, supernaturally and through good technology and expertise, to fix them when when they are not so good.

made it

Made it through a rough 3 days of working, particularly made rough by my trepidation over training in another area. God's gotten me through, though, and I'm still up (?!).

Those who pray, please pray for a friend of mine who's going through a really rough time--no names or further details. God'll know for whom this prayer is.

Thanks, Father, for your sustaining grace.

solomon

Another thing God's shown me: though I've liked Solomon for a long time because, frankly, of his wealth (materialistic me, at least historically), God showed me the difference between Solomon and his father David--a very great difference: though Solomon was wise, in his later years, he did not follow God with his whole heart, as David had. David was great at repenting. I don't know that Solomon did.

I hope Solomon is in Heaven right now. I'm pretty sure David is.

Thanks for having me admit that, Father.

sent

Listening to a service by Robb Yandian of Grace Church--he mentioned the verse that says, at the end, "...how shall they preach unless they are sent?" God just showed me how important that is--preachers, missionaries, etc need support. Whether we are the ones going out in the field or whether we are the senders, we need to know and obey God in and fulfill our role.

Thank You, Father, for the understanding.

unique

Listening to a Kenneth E. Hagin message, God showed me that healing doesn't come in the same way to different people--there's no set formula that works for every situation--just because a method worked with one person doesn't mean exactly the same thing will work with another person. We need to listen and be led by the Holy Spirit when praying for somebody, whether that somebody is ourselves or not.

Thanks for the reveal, Father, and for showing me that it doesn't matter if it looks like I didn't know this before--I do now. It matters not how I look.

...

God reminded me of this: He provides. On the way down to Oklahoma City, I ejected a CD and found, without really looking, a Christian station to listen to. That's provision.

I'm also grateful for God's material provision--food, shelter, stuff, money...I've got two good new headlights on the car now because of God's abundance of provision, and I've still got money to sow, which I'll do right after this blog.

I was also listening to a KCM message, this time with Bill Winston as a guest. He mentioned/said that God won't bless you (financially, I think) beyond what you can handle. Which is why it's imperative to handle what He gives me well--because it's a responsibility and because it's the only way to get more. Reminds me of the parable of the talents, where those who did wisely with what they were given were given more and the one who didn't got what he had taken away from him, and his end was, well, not ideal.

Thank You for the reminder, Father.

caught

The Holy Spirit always tries to warn us off of sin. This time I heeded some of that warning.

Thank You, Father, for the Holy Spirit. And for ears that hear.

appreciation

I'm learning some metal guitar, and I hadn't realised HOW good a guitarist Dave Mustaine is until just recently--like about five minutes ago.

Thanks for the appreciation, Father. :)

things work out

So yesterday I joined something entertainment-related, something very good for my career. Then I got a surprise and stressed out about that, but, thank God, it's all worked out. So cool.

Thanks for working thing out like You did, Father. :)

already there

Today I found out I'm already big enough, muscle-wise, to be a light-heavyweight bodybuilder at the NPC level. Well, under a lot of fat, that is. ;) It's amazing to know what I'm already on-track for, what I can already do with just some more work, discipline and faith.

Thanks for letting me know, Father. :)

tats

Talked to my pastor recently about tattoos, whether they're right or wrong according to a passage in the Bible. He said he thinks they meant burning or scarring yourself, not necessarily inking yourself. Makes sense to me, given the context. I'm grateful for the continued relaxing of what I used to think was required. It's surprising what's actually okay vs. what we make not okay.

Thanks, Father, for others' opinions and for wisdom and for relief.